Remarks by President McAleese at the official opening of Lauralynn House
Tuesday, 27th September, 2011
It is good to be part of this gathering for the official opening of LauraLynn House. Thanks to Philomena Dunne for her invitation and to each of you for the warm welcome.
The Children’s Sunshine home puts together two lovely words - children and sunshine - and for most parents our children are exactly that. They are the light in our lives, the warmth in our hearts, the very core of our homelife. We would do anything to make sure that the sun always shines in their little lives, that they would know only fun and happiness. But in the words of Seamus Heaney “anything can happen” and sometimes sad and tragic things happen to children.
In Ireland today there are at least 1,400 children living with a life-limiting condition and almost 500 children die tragically every year. Who could ever adequately describe or quantify the heartache, the crushing devastation caused by those bare statistics? Who but someone who has lived the trauma could ever know the grief of knowing that your ill child is not going to get better and is facing an early departure from this life? Who knows the pressures on parents who have to adapt themselves to that reality while making important decisions about their child’s medical care, supporting the child emotionally and physically, caring for siblings and preparing them for the tough times that lie ahead? Not one of us would volunteer for such a journey but for those who are stuck with it because that is the hand that our capricious world has dealt them, they need good company and every possible assistance we can give them.
More often than not family, friends and neighbours produce miracles of goodness and care that lighten the burden but, with the best will in the world, there is a level of expert care that is also essential so that terminally ill children can have a comfortable, pain-free death, a good death surrounded by love.
Nothing and no one can make easy the experience of the illness, dying and death of a child. The loss of a child is utterly life-altering but there are ways in which some of the dread, some of the fear, some of the awful loneliness can be assuaged. That is what LauraLynn House exists for. It is our first hospice devoted to the very specific needs of very sick and dying children. Here, dying children who cannot remain at home can spend their final days surrounded by familiar possessions and faces, in a home from home environment, away from the impersonal and often intimidating world of a hospital ward. Emotionally drained and exhausted parents can be offered respite while knowing their child is happy and well cared for. Sound, accessible, ready guidance can be provided on many of the practical and emotional issues involved in caring for a terminally-ill child, including ensuring that the child is allowed to die in peace and with dignity. Here, every child will be treated as an individual, a person whose experience of dying is unique to them, different from anyone else’s. Here, the child and their family are right at the very, very heart of the process and their needs and their wishes come first, their lives matter profoundly to the last breath.
LauraLynn House exists because of unspeakable tragedy and breathtaking courage. Jane and Brendan McKenna had to face the deaths of their two beautiful daughters, Laura in 1999 and Lynn in 2001. Instead of letting that deep well of grief close down their lives they drew on it as a resource that helped them envision this place – custom-designed to help other families, other children in similar circumstances. Named after Laura and Lynn, its very naming reminds us of the enduring value of even the shortest life, the endless love that ensures their memory keeps on making its mark, its imprint on the world where they no longer walk.
Hugh O’Donnell’s little poem puts it well:
“My little man, down what centuries
Of light did you travel
To reach us here,
Your stay so short-lived.
In the twinkling of an eye
You were moving on,
Bearing our name and a splinter
Of the human cross we suffer.
Flashed upon us like a beacon,
We wait in darkness for that light
To come around, knowing at heart
You shine forever for us.”
Thanks to Jane and Brendan, their girls are now synonymous with the light of help for those facing dwindling hope of life and who need to believe there is a way to, through and beyond death. I thank them both and all who supported them and all who have committed to this project for creating this precious space - a space none of us wants to contemplate ever having to use but a space that today and tomorrow will be the only bit of good news in the day of a family facing a diagnosis of serious or terminal illness of a child.
Finally I would like to say how truly privileged I am to be here today to officially open LauraLynn House, where the memory and spirit of two very special girls for generations to come, will be lavishing loving care where it is most needed.
Go raibh míle maith agaibh go léir.